In a world where fairytales and blockbuster romcoms idealize and fantasize marriage as a celebration of everlasting love, it’s not uncommon to hear soon-to-be-wed couples dismissing the notion of a prenuptial agreement as “unnecessary,” “pessimistic,” or “unromantic.” For much of history, divorce was perceived as a failure, even as an immoral act.
The entertainment industry indirectly reinforces the unrealistic expectation that unbreakable vows of love will somehow conquer all. Ariana Grande, in her hit song, once famously sang, “Only wanna do it once, real bad, gonna make that last.” The sentiment is clear: people, especially those in their twenties, want one and only one marriage, and for it to last throughout their lifetime.
But even the most beautiful, affluent, and “perfect” couples experience trouble in paradise. Headlines about Adam Levine’s infidelity during his marriage to Victoria’s Secret supermodel Behati Prinsloo questioned how the member of a band so widely renowned for its love songs could act so dishonorably.
“It’s not always rainbows and butterflies
— She Will Be Loved, Maroon 5.
It’s compromise that moves us along”
But some might say that the scandal is simply telling of the harsh reality of marriage. The breakdown of trust and communication is impossible to predict. People can change in unexpected ways, for which one or both people are unprepared.
While some might call it boring or too serious, a prenuptial agreement is a powerful tool that encourages both parties to confront the topics that may have been avoided for the sake of a fun and light engagement. Rather than go down the route of blissful ignorance, couples should seek a Pre-Nup Attorney to help with the due diligence and negotiation of establishing a premarital contract.
Marriage has evolved in many ways over time. Americans are marrying at an older age, which means they have spent more of their pre-marital lives accumulating wealth and assets than previous generations. Individual ownership is an important and often misunderstood topic. Many Americans have little understanding of the finances of divorce. Given the significance of national divorce rates, couples should consult with a Family Mediator or Law Office to discuss their paths forward.
A prenuptial agreement is not designed to undermine the sanctity of marriage. A prenup can be seen as a partnership agreement where the marriage itself is a legal, financial, emotional, and even physical partnership that deserves careful consideration, as with any investment or major life decision.
Research shows that financial conflicts are strong predictors of divorce compared to other common marital disputes. The inherent discussion during pre-nuptial negotiations preemptively addresses the sources of financial disagreement, as pre-nuptial agreements have terms that stipulate the division of assets and property in the event of legal separation or divorce.
“No matter what, we’re going to figure it out and that’s why we don’t need a prenup, because I’m making a promise that divorce won’t be necessary, that we will figure this out.”
— Jada Pinkett Smith
Sometimes, reality is as cold and hard as a slap in the face. Even the most steadfast believers of everlasting love and happiness can find themselves beholden to past decisions.